Almost EVERYDAY in school i heard people talk people . And you know what ? Im phobia . Not actually phobia but more to realization . I was shocked because they talked about their own friend . Bestfriend i could say . It makes me realize that wow so this was the actual thing, when you shared your story, shared opinions, be yourself, that is what you get . Been talked . Dalam kelas ku ler . Kelas bawah lagi la Ya Allah .
That makes me think harder & harder than before . And then i came out with one resolution that till now i have slight regret about it . I pull myself away from people . Im thinking that maybe by that i'll get myself away from all the cakap-cakap you know . And also im thinking that maybe i'll just have to start a new life when im ready to or maybe, when im already out from SMSP . New people, new life . But waiting for that time to come & been talked by others during the time is so fcking damn long . Sometimes i felt like time passed very slow & sometimes passed verrrrryyyy fast . I felt slow when i want something to end fast . But then i felt fast when i want that thing to stay . Duhh semua orang pun begitu =.= kan . What a life .
Im sad . Sad by all the things that happened . Sad with all the people that asdfghhjkl . That only know other people's weaknesses but not his/herself . Im hoping that they open up their mind . Jangan merperbesarkan hal yang remeh . Setakat kelemahan, semua pun ada kan ? Lain lah kalau orang tue pun perangai cam asdf kan ? Setakat kau menyampah, kau yakin orang lain pun tak menyampah ngan kau ?
Btw, im not act like im good or what but thats the truth . If you close to me then you will know me . I may be look like people that always cakap-cakap orang, jahat, mengolok, trep baik alim or whatsoever . But once you know me, really really know me, then you will know the real me . I have a bit consciousness you know . Many things make me realize . Do you know why i hate it ? (i mean the cakap-cakap) Because i know how it feels like been talked by people so why dafuq i wanna talk about others too, right ? Especially when the person didn't do anything wrong . It feels hurt . Damn hurt . Im trying to be nice with people . But some are just .... (i can't get a suitable word to describe it . gahh)
Bukakan fikiran, sucikan hati . Whats the point you learn agama if you didn't apply it to yourself ? Once again, im not act like im good nor pious, im simply just saying what state in my mind . Aku tahu aku nie tidak lah alim sangat, bertudung pun belum lagi kan . Tapi sekurang-kurangnya aku cuba .
So, bukakan fikiran sucikan hati .
*for people that just can't get her/his life out of me probably because they don't have their own . im the one that should be sorry for you guys . have a life, k ?*
-not for YOU guys . You guys are ok . I've already forgiven yall & this is for some of the people at lowww class :)
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